I left money on the table

It was more than I was worth

Scrawled a note

Crawled into bed

And fell into a dream so dark

I couldn’t remember

Above my empty body I rose

Floated through the walls of my room

Towards the blackness of a sky polluted by city lights

The rain fell gently through me as I traveled

Across places I had never seen

And faces I had never been

Conversation’s fragments raked across my feet

But I was afraid to look down

Even when I heard my name

I was still afraid

For it was not love with which it was spoken

The name was a curse

Spat from the lips

Like venom from the ill

On I drifted

Towards a sun that would never shine

Searching for a moon I’d never find

Warmth seeped from my ears

From the gaping hole in my chest

From beneath my fingernails

Life’s blood, or was it tears

Somewhere in the stillness of the night

I heard myself still crying

And knew I had not died

My eyes opened with a searing flash of pain

Rays of light pouring through my windows

Stabbing into the recesses of my skull

Into my tainted soul

I am awake

But for this life of me I cannot understand why


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